One man drinks a lot of wine;
He walks along a crooked line.
One man dopes himself with coke...
Death! It's not a joke!
One man falls without a chute;
Yeah! Somebody, shoot! 
One man's blown into the sky,
And somehow he feels alright!

One man pushed the button "PLAY",
Then he vanished into thin air.
One man splattered into atoms...
Never touch the strange red buttons!
One man did the stupid things
And became a mighty king.
One man worked all day and night
And went out of his mind.

One shouldn't listen to this crazy song,
Because I wrote it when I was stoned...

This is a silly song,
Don't listen to it!
I wrote this song when I was stoned,
When I was young and stupid.

This is a silly song,
It's really stupid!
Just turn it off if I turn it on,
Delete it from your new iPhone,
And never download it.