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Good advice

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  • Аннотация:
    a Thanksgiving ballad for my two bosses

  Good advice
  
  There are two bosses that you must select,
  
  For it"s always good to have one to abuse you
  
   and one - to neglect,
  
  
  
  One with a neat desk and a hood you will not be afraid to use,
  
  And one with a good haircut and clean shoes.
  
  
  
  One that sounds like he supervises everyone in here - you never happen to doubt it,
  
  Another who acts like he jumped a ship not too long ago
  
   and is probably sorry about it;
  
  
  
  One has hard a time trying to cut a few thousand extra words out of his paper,
  
  Another one easily gets around with these:
  
   "free", "expensive", "That"s cool", "I forgot"
  
   and "We"ll worry about it later".
  
  
  
  One would convince you that you"re irreplaceable and unique,
  
  The other would be most happy with you,
  
   if you could outgrow your position in a week.
  
  
  
  One cannot access his computer without a curse,
  
  The other might call you "an assette",
  
   but you"ll never hear any worse.
  
  
  
  That one"s a great babysitter;
  
   he can teach you things and talk to you all day long,
  
  but the next day you"ll have that bad case of hangover,
  
   when you can"t remember what you said yesterday,
  
   but assume it was totally wrong.
  
  
  
  Thank God, with the first one you have little chance
  
   to regret anything you say,
  
  For it takes him about 5 seconds
  
   to make you shut up (in the friendliest possible way).
  
  
  
  And if you manage to learn that from him,
  
   your people skills are greatly improving,
  
  Though you have to be a nitrogen tank
  
   in order to find him moving.
  
  
  
  Though the second one may be rough with stuff,
  
   with the staff he"s as careful as a surgeon,
  
  And even when he is full of "it", somehow "it" sounds extra virgin;
  
  
  
  Because it"s well diluted with patience, good intention and cheer,
  
  And you find him so helpful
  
   every time you forget
  
   what on earth you are doing here...
  
  
  
  But if you"ve just messed up your experiment
  
   and need consolation, you go to the other one,
  
  For he"s been in this business for centuries
  
   and there"s no stupid thing that he hasn"t done.
  
  
  
  
  
  This choice is very important for making
  
   your professional life complete,
  
  Since there"s hardly a need of yours two of them together won"t meet;
  
  
  
  It also doubles the range of your troubles,
  
   but that is all for the best,
  
  "cause switching troubles is a sure way to stay happy,
  
   like switching tasks is a good way to get rest.
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О.Болдырева "Крадуш. Чужие души" М.Николаев "Вторжение на Землю"

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