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The Dickery Accident [request]

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  • Аннотация:
    For the AiE thread.
  Day 6664 in Equestria.
  Everyp0ny was doing their usual everyday jobs.
  Anon walked past Roseluck's flower stand, when he suddenly noticed something odd.
  This passing grey pegasus' eyes... It can't be! He should have met her by now!
  'Hey, miss...'
  The mare turned her head to him - it was real!
  The spiral energy was so concentrated it burned!
  Anon couldn't help savoring every bit of the incredible energy flow that struck his very soul.
  But... It started to build up inside him.
  He tried to fight the sensation, but the efforts were futile.
  If he went on holding back, he would probably explode, destroying a sizable chunk of P0nyville.
  
  ...Anyway, what's the point in holding back?
  Anon suddenly threw his pants to the side, causing a flash of pants-lightning, breaking
  the record of speed pants blasting, ever done by any living human (or p0ny, for that matter).
  He crossed his legs and dropped to the ground with a 'thud!'
  The pegasus was startled by the events. She tried to touch Anon's shoulder, but was thrown back
  by a blast of energy, as he closed his eyes, attained two-handed grip on his member and shouted:
  'My dick is the dick that will pierce the Heavens!'
  
  Anon began working his shaft, starting slowly, but in a few seconds he was furiously faping.
  The surrounding p0nies were highly disturbed by the sight, but could not approach him,
  the ongoing blasts of unknown energy throwing away even unicorn magic.
  Twilight Sparkle was enthralled by the unfolding events. She produced paper and quill and was
  writing down everything, adding comments on the fly. She had never seen such magic before!
  Meanwhile, Anon began to chant:
  'Do the impossible, see the invisible.'
  'Row! Row! Fap the power!'
  'Touch the untouchable, break the unbreakable.'
  'Row! Row! Fap the power!'
  Then his body lifted, hovering without any support, except his dickery magic.
  The expression on his face was of utmost determination.
  Then the energy expelled by his dong became visible.
  It was now much less chaotic and much more stable.
  Aligning itself into a vortex, it began spinning Anon in the air, gaining speed each second.
  Then he opened his eyes wide, made a final stroke and whispered, being heard only by Twilight:
  'The dick is my... Soul!'
  Then he was gone. Just disappeared in plain sight.
  By this point some p0nies were glad about it. The wild energy blasts did quite a bit of damage
  to surrounding buildings, though the buildup was gradual enough that nop0ny got hurt.
  
  Twilight was fascinated. When she first met Anon, she had him describe his previous life.
  He specifically stated there was no magic in his home world.
  She couldn't believe that and did a few tests - that proved him true, Anon really had never been
  exposed to magic before the event that transported him to P0nyville.
  But now he exhibited the levels of magic, unbeknownst even to her, the most knowledgeable unicorn
  of all Equestria, Princess Celestia's personal student!
  According to observations, it was some kind of teleportation. Most definitely long-range and
  probably even transdimensional!
  Oh, the implications...
  Twilight was slightly angry at Anon. Why hadn't he ever told her he could do something like this?
  If she replicated and harnessed this effect, she would be able to make earth ponies and pegasi
  able to use teleportation. And maybe other magic too! Princess would be proud of her student!
  
  Applejack, who was also present nearby when the event occured, tried to ask Twilight what she
  was doing, but the unicorn was too busy to pay any attention. She was in the middle of calculating
  some extremely sophisticated magic, drawing diagrams and scribbling incomprehensible equations.
  
  Applejack was worried about Anon's disappearance too, but even more worried seeing Twilight in this
  state. She tried to disturb her, but soon understood it was an impossible task to do on her own.
  This required help of all the Elements, before Twilight did something irremediable!
  
  In took almost an hour to gather her friends and persuade them that the dick-a-portation accident
  wasn't some kind of a stupid joke (Rarity was disgusted, Rainbow Dash got excited by such a cool
  outurst from this otherwise very mediocre and uninteresting Anon, Pinkie Pie yelled something
  incomprehensible about 'spin-the-world-on-the-horn-party!' and Fluttershy was... Shy).
  
  When mares arrived to the center of P0nyville, they found Twilight still there. Though she apparently
  had ran out of paper - now the ground around her and the walls of the buildings were covered with
  her scribbles and she began drawing glowing runes in the air.
  On noticing her approaching friends, she ran up to them and without listening to any objections,
  demonstrating almost Pinkie-level determination and unstoppability positioned them at the sides of
  the glowing diagram.
  'This was some kind of ritual... Yet he is a human, I am a pony, also I am a mare, not a stallion.'
  'I managed to figure out a way to partially adjust the ritual to me and vice versa. It begins!'
  
  Twilight sat on the ground Lyra style, putting her hooves to her crotch.
  Wisps of light erupted from the diagram around her as she shouted:
  'The dick has opened a hole in space. And that hole will become a road for those that follow!'
  Faint speckpes of purple energy began flowing out of Twilight, twirling between her and the other
  Elements, creating multiple small vortices. The mares just stood there dumbfounded, except Pinkie,
  who was digging through her saddlebags, desperately trying to find something.
  Twilight chanted, moving her hooves in an intricate pattern over her marehood:
  'If you're gonna dig, dig to pierce the heavens, even if it's my womb I'm digging, I'll keep going!'
  'When I break through, it means I've WON! Who the hell do you think I am? I'm Twilight. I'm not Anon.'
  'I am myself! Twilight the Digger!'
  'We evolve beyond the p0ny that we were a minute before. Little by little we advance with each turn.'
  'Thats how a dick appears!'
  By now Twilight's marehood was winking rapidly, her clit suddenly increasing in size and becoming
  a full-sized member, which caused the energy torrents around her triple in intensity.
  A chunk of the ground started levitating, carrying Twilight, spinning wildly in the dickstorm.
  'I'm Futa Twilight... The Great Elements of Harmony Leader, Twilight the Dicker!'
  'If you become a wall blocking my way... I'll drill a hole in you and blow you apart anytime!'
  'That is... my dickery!'
  And with these words Twilight disappeared.
  
  Pinkie finally found what she was searching for. Almost completely leaning inside her saddlebag,
  she brought forth an improbably huge cake with a spiral pattern on its icing and threw it to the center,
  where Twilight had just been.
  With a loud 'CABOOM!' the cake exploded - and confused, thunderstruck and covered in spiraling
  ornaments of semen and squash soup Twilight appeared in its place.
  She never talked about what she had seen that day or where she had been, the only clue being this letter:
  
  Dear Princess Celestia,
  Today I learned that one does not simply pierce the Heavens.
  Your faithful student, Twilight Sparkle.
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О.Болдырева "Крадуш. Чужие души" М.Николаев "Вторжение на Землю"

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